


Mistakes

by honeypuffed



Category: Marvel
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-03
Updated: 2012-09-03
Packaged: 2017-11-13 11:14:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/502927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/honeypuffed/pseuds/honeypuffed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Teddy is the world’s biggest idiot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mistakes

**Author's Note:**

> This came about as a big mess of things on Tumblr, so [this](http://nonowest.tumblr.com/post/7075940186) is an accurate summary of that, complete with wonderful art.

Billy does a lot of stupid things; they all know it. It's a problem sometimes. Often. A lot lately.

But Teddy thinks he's probably just outdone him, by a significant amount. He can't even remember thinking this was a good idea, and yet here he is, telling Billy he can't do it, not anymore, _not like this_.

Billy stares at him blankly for a few seconds, frowning, pulling his lips up into a half-smile to test if Teddy is joking and then drops them again. There's a few more seconds of silence before Billy holds a shaky hand to his face, then turns on his heel and walks out of Teddy's room without saying a word.

Teddy slumps down on the bed. Fuck.

He can hear Billy through the wall, sobbing into his pillow, scrunching the blanket up around him. It doesn't make Teddy feel any better — if anything it makes him feel worse to know that he's done this, but. But he has to listen. He rests against the wall, heart stuck in his throat, choking him as Billy cries and cries and cries until he can't cry anymore. Teddy shoves his palms into his eyes and waits until Billy is silent, and then lies down.

But he never quite falls asleep.

 

The next morning, Billy doesn't show for breakfast. His mum knocks on his door a few times, but the only answer she gets is extended silence, and so she gives up. When she asks after him, a wave of guilt washes over Teddy, and all he can manage to say is, "I don't know," before he goes back to quietly eating his cereal. It's hard to swallow.

Billy trails a distance behind him all the way to training, to the point where Teddy figures they might as well have just gone separately.

It's so obvious to all of them, from the minute they show up, metres apart. So obvious that something has gone horribly wrong. It's probably obvious too that it's Teddy's fault, but no one brings it up anyway. Teddy is grateful for it. For them.

And it's only training, but Billy manages to hurt himself twice in the same way within a few minutes, blood pouring down his left arm as he does his best not to cry. It doesn't really hurt. It's not that at all.

 

It isn't long before Billy starts bringing home others. _Flings_. Nights when his family are out. Nights when it's late enough so no one is up anyway. Sort of.

"Shouldn't we be quiet?" the boy asks, and Billy shakes his head and tugs his wrist a little harder, eyes focused on his feet as he leads them to his bedroom.

He doesn't look up at Teddy, though he's aware they're being watched, and instead just says, "No, nobody's around." He glances up at the boy — he has black hair, he'd forgotten — and then pulls him through his doorway.

He doesn't bother to close the door.

Billy pushes the boy down onto the bed without hesitation and straddles his thighs. "What was your name again?" he asks and then quickly says, "No wait. Never mind." He unzips the boy's jeans. "Doesn't matter."

It's quick and dirty and clothed and Billy doesn't kiss him nor let himself get kissed, and he thinks _Teddy Teddy Teddy_ and does his best not to say it out loud, and he has the boy gone before he's even done cleaning up.

Teddy covers his ears with his hands as best he can, but he still hears everything. It makes him feel sick and he wants to run in and tear Billy away from him and punch the other kid in the face and not hold back but. It's not his place. He did this, and so Billy can. Billy can—

 

After Billy brings a fourth home, Teddy snaps. He barges through Billy's open door as Billy lies on his back and some asshole with tattoos all over his left side is tugging Billy's boxers down over his ankles.

"Out of this house. Now."

The guy scrambles away as soon as he sees Teddy. So Teddy might have bulked up for this, accidentally.

Billy rolls over onto his stomach and buries his face in the pillow. "You are a dick," he mumbles into the fabric. "It's not your fucking place."

Teddy pulls a sheet over him, and Billy tries to kick him.

"Get out," Billy tells him, a lot less demanding than he'd been going for.

Teddy can hear Billy start sobbing again before he's even reached the doorway and he wants to stop and turn around and run to Billy's side and pretend none of this ever happened because how could he be so stupid to do this anyway this can't be real he must be dreaming or stuck in a never ending nightmare or something, except.

Except he isn't. And there is no easy fix. And it's all his goddamn fault.

 

Time seems to move slower when they're not dating. So much of Billy's drive for getting up of a morning is lost, and he just wants Teddy to get out of his house because he hates him he hates him he _loves_ him, and it's so insanely hard like this. How long does this normally last? Will he _ever_ get over it? Teddy, that bastard.

Billy's head jerks towards the door. It's not a knock, but instead a light fluttering of paper. He frowns. He waits until he can hear Teddy shuffle away before he slowly rises from his desk and drags himself to the door. His heart is pounding.

There's a small scrap of paper just under the door, and he picks it up and squeezes his eyes shut for a moment to process everything. There's a heart haphazardly drawn on it, and when he opens his eyes and flips it over, it just says, "Also, I'm sorry." Billy doesn't even get a chance to breathe in before the tears start spilling down over his cheeks once more.

He wipes at his eyes again and again and finally gathers the courage to stumble out of his bedroom and into Teddy's.

Teddy stands up quickly, and balls his fists at his sides, impossibly nervous and brows scrunched as far as they'll go. Before he can talk himself out of it, Billy jumps at him.

"I hate you," Billy sobs, face pressed into Teddy's neck and arms wrapped tightly around him. His nails are digging into Teddy's shoulder-blades and he knows it won't hurt him, but he's not sure he'd care if it did.

"I know," Teddy says softly, voice breaking. "I know."

Billy tightens his grip and bites down hard on Teddy's neck. The muscles in his face are sore and tired from crying but he can't stop. "I hate—" Fuck. He can't even. Just.

"I know," Teddy says again, and rubs small circles into Billy's back, hoping he won't pull away.

"It's not-" Billy chokes out, "I don't forgive you." He pulls his head away enough to press his lips to Teddy's. It's been weeks. Maybe longer. He can't keep track. He bites Teddy's lower lip and watches until it stops bleeding, then kisses him again.

"I'm so sorry, Billy." Teddy squeezes him tighter. He wants to fix this. "I'm really so, so sorry. I really fucked up for once—"

" _For once_?" Billy repeats, and Teddy thinks oh god he's just fucked up _again_ , but then Billy starts laughing while the tears are still streaming down his face and he cups Teddy's cheeks in his hands and presses their foreheads together. " _Idiot boyfriend_."

Teddy lips quirk up just a little and he thinks maybe. Maybe they could.


End file.
